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 Concern
 Treatment
 Pregnancy
 Experiences

Experiences

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Anna & Pete (Australia)
Chapter Four: My wife the Mad Cow
I admire the choice Anna made to self
inject, but it broke my heart that she willingly caused herself so
much torment. Every morning, half an hour prior to the scheduled
injection, she would lock herself in the bathroom and ‘psych’
herself up. I would stand outside the door, listening to her cry,
laugh, talk to herself and then go silent. The conversation that
she usually had was about our friend who is a diabetic. She would
tell herself:
“ Stop being silly Anna, think of Simon, he has to do this five
times a day. Yeah but I’m not Simon. But you don’t have to do this
everyday forever. I know, but why do I have to do it all? Having a
family was meant to be easy. And what if, after all this, I still
don’t have a baby?”
Then I would hear her crying silently, and then sobbing to herself
to just do it. I knew that, when she had ceased her own little
conversation, she was actually injecting. I felt completely useless
and guilty. Guilty because the problem is mine, and useless because
she wouldn’t let me help her; she was determined to do this on her
own. This part of the IVF process, was her journey and her journey
alone. Once she had injected herself she left the bathroom quite
happy and content, giggling and making light of her own antics. She
would laugh at herself saying that she had a split personality and
that I had a mad cow as a wife. We would both have a giggle, but
silently knew that we would re-enact this scene again the following
morning.

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